The Bigger or Smaller, The More Egotistical

Driving on Malaysia roads can be stressful. But in passing the time especially during traffic congestions, I’ve observed a weird finding based on the vehicles being driven on our roads.

The smaller or bigger the vehicle, the more egotistical the drivers are in those vehicles. I’d like to call upon evidence 2-010-A.

Motorcyclist

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In particular, the kapchai models. They’re affordable, agile and averagely speedy. Because of these characteristics, some riders think they’re the king of the road.

From hogging the lane, squeezing through and hitting your side mirrors to beating the light. Just because Β the oncoming car isn’t very near, they want to be Evel Knievel for a few minutes. Some even do it when the oncoming traffic light had just turned green.

Next, I’d like to call on evidence 2-010-B.

Buses

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They’re definitely “munsters” on the road. I’ve rarely seen any respecting bus drivers on the road. If there were, I can count only a handful, 1 hand. The egotistical ones choose to stop nearly anywhere along the road, like taxis!

The buses I’ve seen especially worrisome are express buses. While driving behind them, they’re on the roads at 100-120km/h. Why in the world are there 80-90km/h stickers then! And they maneuver like they’re driving, taxis!

Final evidence I’d like to call on is 2-010-C.

Lorries

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They are the creme de la creme. Just because they’ve brute strength and size, they’ve every right to stare at you and blame you for not giving them way! But I find the worst ones, are the ones which park anywhere. Even if it meant blocking the road.

Has the jury made a decision?

Is the smallest vehicle or the largest vehicle, the most egotistical? πŸ˜›

Do Malaysian Females Outnumber Males?

Have you ever sat down, look around and wondered, does Malaysia have too many women? Is the female population in Malaysia larger as compared to the male species?

I can’t find any updated numbers to back this up even after browsing Wikipedia and our very own government statistics department. According to Wikipedia, 2005 was an estimated 1.01 (male/female) ratio. So, I’m not sure about it now.

But yeah, I’ve been observing the many people while seated and noticed I see more females around as compared to guys.

Yes, obviously it’s normal for a guy to look at girls but seriously, I feel the girls are outnumbering the male species in Malaysia.

Femme fatale!

Google Nexus One Unboxing Ninja Style

My friend; Hakim, twittered this super cool video earlier. It’s got all the makings of a viral video thanks to stop motion (it looks like it to me) and ninjas. Who doesn’t love ninjas? If you’re a chic, sorry for asking. πŸ˜›

But seriously, stop motion is ultimately cool when really taken the time and task to do it. And this video was done by YouTube director Patrick Bolvin for Google. How phreaking cool is that?!

Some memorable and respectable stop motion I’ve seen before:

  • Tim Burton’s The Night Before Christmas
  • Corpse Bride
  • James and The Giant Peach
  • Harvie Krumpet
  • Wallace & Gromit

Stop motion is basically capturing still frames (one-by-one) and combining it into a near smooth animated form of film. The passion for stop motion varies between creators as it requires a lot of patience and eye for detail. Some would probably say you’re crazy especially when handycams are so widely available now.

Well, that’s why it’s a passion.

Iban Doing The Melbourne Shuffle

While some people are telling us to beware the Internet, look at how the Internet could evolve our Malaysian culture. All the way across the oceans to the natives.

By the way, the Melbourne shuffle has a strong following in Malaysia and I think I see them more often in raves. Probably it’s because of the suitable music; electronic trance.

Well, dancing is an art in many forms. Look at the self-defense technique called; capoeira. I’ve always wondered how some dancers shuffling can slide so smoothly. Some, without even flipping.

My Valentine’s Day

With a Hollywood celebrity, I wish. But no harm imagining or dreaming about it, right? So, between a whole list of celebrities like:

  • Jessica Alba
  • Kathy Bates
  • Jessica Biel
  • Jennifer Garner
  • Anne Hathaway
  • Queen Latifah
  • Shirley MacLaine
  • Emma Roberts
  • Julia Roberts
  • Taylor Swift

For some reason, I’d choose Anne Hathaway over the super hot Jessica Alba. It was a difficult choice between Julia Roberts too because, I mean, she’s Julia Roberts!

So what would a valentine’s day be if an Academy Award Winner like Anne Hathaway and me have? Well, I’m going to be realistic about this dream but not boring. Good luck to me. πŸ˜‰

In Flight Entertainment

aeroplane photo

Obviously, if she were traveling to Malaysia she’d need to fly. So what better way than asking Malaysia Airlines if I could steal a 30 second slot in their video segment. I’d use the 30-seconds to introduce myself and Malaysia to Anne. Not to mention, let her know I’ll be picking her up.

The Pickup

bullock cart

It might be awesome to introduce her to our bullock cart. But I think it’ll be too much of a culture shock for her. So, I’ll probably tell her to look out for the person wearing an orange t-shirt, orange shorts and white shoes. Orange shoes would’ve probably freaked her out and be a fashion disaster!

Cruising, Talking, Breaking the ice

We’ll do our best to runaway from her sticky guards and drive off. But if that failed, then I’d politely ask if they would take the airport limo and tail us then. In the car, we’d be talking and I’d ask for her help a little by popping the dashboard compartment open.

photo album

The photo album will be filled with photos of the fun-filled things we could do in Malaysia. This would be a great ice breaker for us to get to know one another and plan the next agenda.

Beautiful Malaysia, Beautiful Anne

night view

For food, I’d definitely ask her to try our famous local cuisines like nasi lemak, satay, roti canai and others. However, as dusk would fall, it’s time to do something a little different. Wouldn’t it be awesome if we had fireworks?

Dine Up

hot air balloon

Indeed, we’d be hovering near the skies and the clouds. Having a sumptuous dinner all cooked and served in the hot air balloon. And because there won’t be enough space for her bodyguards, they may choose to hang on the anchor rope if they’d like. πŸ˜›

Ending With Panache

fireworks

As it turned to night, now it was finally time to end our lovely evening. Nothing’s better than being able to walk along the beach among the cool breeze. But because I wanted to end the night with panache, I’d give Anne her own private fireworks display over the open sea.

The fireworks would lit and write, “thank you, you are more real than any fairy tale.”

Farewell Gift

polaroid

Image credits: annnna

And at the end of this fairy tale, we’ll have ourselves a polaroid photo to remember this moment. A plain guy from Malaysia who celebrated his Valentine’s with an Academy Award Winner like Anne Hathaway.