For what you’re worth

While I understand your frustration and anger may be towards others who may have undermined you, I hope you had the slightest thought that your remark wasn’t proof of anything. Because from where I stood, I only saw it as a┬ápaycheck. And I would think you only got it because you had the ability to command it. And that ability was thanks to your visitors.

Sorry. I had to let that out. It disturbs me to stumble on people who feel they’re all high and mighty, than looking at both sides of the coin.

Because yes, we are underestimated. However, we are in this situation not because others feel we deserve it. It’s because they don’t understand the mechanics which drives it. Therefore, they’ve more insecurity.

If you really wanted to prove your worth, then instead tell how you managed to help the ones who engaged your services. Did they make money? Did your visitors engage with you in a conversation? What were the results?

If you don’t know the answer to those questions, then you should be educating more on the why and how it equals to your worth than blowing your horn about your expected worth.

The day ruined

Ever had one of those mornings where something happens, you don’t think too much of it and for an unknown reason, it turns out to be not a good day. Well, mine oddly started with a ballpoint pen snapping its hook piece which I’ve amended before. And I thought nothing of it since it was broken and glued it back before.

Then came my morning business meeting with a client. I’m not going to reveal or talk a lot about this matter to maintain a level of professionalism. However, what I would say is my day was ruined from that meeting onwards.

It was so bad, I tweeted that I felt like punching something and breaking my arm. Though I guess I’m lucky to have a friend always nearby – like chewak. Thanks for trying to turn the scenario around.

My whole being was so stressed from this morning that I could’ve just broken down. Even when I got home, I didn’t have any appetite. I just ate Maggi mee for the sake of knowing I’ll need to eat.

Then as much as I wanted to join Ariel for dinner with her colleagues, I couldn’t lose this feeling of being suffocated by this darkness. I felt like even if I forced myself to go, I’d be such a killjoy without much emotion. So I just told her, I wanted to be alone for awhile.

Though I did manage to get some work done and the darkness isn’t as heavy anymore, I still feel a pressure on my chest.

It was really a day ruined. FML.